ABOUT TO GIVE UP?

‎I just felt the prompting to put this down because someone out there might just need this at this moment. 

Have you ever felt empty deep within you? You have everything you ever want but you are still feeling empty. You wake up each morning with a deep seated longing for something but you just can’t figure out what that thing is.  Every night brings a sudden darkness upon your soul. You go to bed each night wishing morning will never come. Do you feel like giving up? Like all hope is gone? 

Sometimes what we want is not what we need and God does not give us what we don’t need. When nothing makes sense, just trust in Him, you might not understand in the beginning but it will eventually make sense. Look deep within you; you will realize that which makes you feel empty. Acknowledge that which you need even though it’s not what you want and you will find that peace you seek for.

Never give up without a fight. Do not be that person that easily gives up in d face of adversity.  At that moment when all hope seems lost, that is the time for you to brace up and put up a fight until there is nothing left to fight for. Although, it is not everything that is worth fighting for. You can’t save that which does not want to be saved. Have the insight to know that which is worth fighting for and that which is not.

My dear beloved, if you are reading this and you are about to give u, please hold on wait just a little longer and eventually everything will make perfect sense. When God’s time is right and His plans are set in motion, you will be amazed at how beautiful your life will be. It may not make sense now, but it eventually will.

PROTECTING YOURSELF AGAINST HACKERS.

After what I went through recently in the hands of hackers who hijacked my Facebook account, I decided to get these security tips from Wikipedia and share it with you my readers. This is something that should never happen to anyone. 

Use a secured email account. When signing up for an e-mail account or any other account on the internet, make use of all the verification processes it provides. These are usually additional layers of information that is known only to you. The verification processes provided include things such as Phone Verification, SMS Verification and answering specific security questions. Do your research on finding a secure email account, depending on your personal needs; there are reviews available from other users if you do online searches.

Make your email address less easy to guess. If you include a number with your name or an unusual word, etc., it makes it harder for someone to simply guess your name by adding your first and last names together and emailing.

Guard your email password. Do not give it to anybody else, do not store it in your email Drafts folder and do not store it where it can be accessed. Your password is valuable, so treat it as such and keep it confidential.

• Tighten up the security of your account. Add an extra phone number and alternative email address for a password recovery if somehow your account is hacked and the password has been changed. Add security questions related to password recovery so you can recover your hacked password later on.

React promptly but carefully to messages about possible attacks to your email account. If you receive a message from your email provider that they are concerned about the email being compromised, follow it up. Read it carefully though, as if the email itself is a scam, it will have giveaway signs such as bad grammar, illegitimate/spoofed logos, a click-on link to change a password (do not click, always change a password from the account itself), etc.

• If you are suspicious that an email from your email provider isn't real, contact the email company directly, either by phone or by a separate email sent through their actual website. Wait to hear back from them before responding to the suspicious email. Some companies have email abuse or inquiry departments; check their website for more information.

Consider using different email accounts for different purposes. If you want an account where you can be less careless, such as for leaving your email address all over the internet, etc., use a separate one intended just for that and leave nothing personal or sensitive on it, ever. Keep your personal email account secure using the suggestions above but also by not giving it to many people, other than those you trust.

If it's too good to be true, it's suspicious. If you receive emails promising prizes, wins, money exchanges, eternal love, etc., then be very suspicious. Never click on a link promising such things and never reply to the email either. Delete the message without actioning it any further.

SOCIAL NETWORKING

1. Have a secured Facebook account. This is only provided for those who want to sign-up for Facebook. Use your original identity and information to sign-up for an Facebook account. Follow all of the account verification processes provided to make your account secure.

2. Keep your password secure. Do not share it with anyone, do not store it in your mail inbox or anywhere on Facebook or online. Don't share your password with friends. If you log on at a cyber cafe or similar, always remember to log right back off when you finish (better yet, don't use a public computer at all).

Be really careful if using public access computers for Facebook, Twitter, etc. If possible, avoid checking your social networking accounts on anything but your own devices. But if you have no choice, consider the following:

• Never click "keep me logged in", or similar long-term access checks, when entering the site.
• Be aware of who is around you when you key in your password. Cover the keys if you feel safer.
• Be discreet and don't attract attention while using the site. Curiosity can lead some people to want to fiddle just because...
• Always remember to log out when you're done. Just get into the habit of going through a list in your head of "log in, do not check stay logged in, log out" when using public access devices.

Be very careful with third party apps on Facebook, Twitter, etc. Before installing any (if you really must), do research into the reliability, safety and track record of the third party app. Ask friends, ask questions in forums, etc., to reassure yourself of its safety. If you have any doubts, don't install it.

3. Use the account's security settings to make things safer for you. For example, in Facebook, you can check the box that states "Browse Facebook on a secure connection (https) when possible". Enable login notifications––this will alert you should anyone other than yourself attempt to log in to your Facebook account. Enable login approvals too; this will require a special security code to be added should the account be opened from an unknown browser. You'll get a text message should such an attempt be made. And if you like, you can add trusted contacts who can help you get back on the site if you are hacked; simply check and fill the Trusted Contacts field.

• Other social networking accounts have security settings too. Spend time checking these out and enabling what you feel protects you best.

Consider using the Privacy features to limit who can see you. In accounts such as Facebook, only allow friends to see your stuff; that way any "friends of friends" who might be less friendly in intent won't be able to see your account.

• Whatever your social networking account, don't share your account with unknown people. In Facebook as well as Twitter, there is an option by which you can keep your account hidden from the general public, although your profile name will be shown. This option can be found in "Privacy settings " in Facebook and 'Settings ' in Twitter.
• Only share video, photo and other content with friends.
• In Facebook, change the timeline and tagging to be friends only.
• Friend only those people you really know. If you don't know the person, assume it's safest not including them in your Facebook account.

PASSWORD PRECAUTIONS

Use a very strong password. A hacker can access your account by using a attack called 'dictionary attack', in which all of the words from a standard dictionary of the English language is placed in the password box and after a while, the password may be revealed and a hack will occur. To reduce the possibility of a dictionary attack, add numbers, alphabets and even symbols (!@#$%^&) altogether. If the site allows for it, use a pass phrase with numbers and symbols too - this is even harder to crack, although it's not provided as an option as often as passwords.

• An example: Suppose you have the password 'Hello to you' (without the quotes). This could be hacked within an hour or less using a dictionary attack. However, if you modify it to something like: '#ello2u' (without the quotes), it would take more than 1 month or even a year to crack and the hacker is going to give up and look for an easier target.

Don't ever use obvious passwords. For example many people have the tendency of keeping the password as '<your own="" name="">', or 'password' or 'password123' , '<your girlfriend="" boyfriend="" name=""> '. People trying to access your account will use the obvious examples first.

• There are password strength checkers available online for you to test a range of passwords before using them. This can help you work out what is as strong as possible each time.
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Keep changing your passwords. Don't be so confident about your strong password. It can also be hacked within a month, so if you have a persistent hacker who really wants to get your information, make it hard by constantly changing your password. This process must be processed at a minimum of every 3-4 months, more often if possible. It is a good way to keep your memory in shape too!

Don't use the same password in every web based account you have. Doing this could be the greatest pitfall ever, for if a hacker comes to know your Facebook password, the obvious next step is to input this password into other accounts in the hope you've been lazy and used the same one over and over. If you have, then bingo! Your whole web life could be wiped out.

GENERAL PRECAUTIONS:

Keep your account information details safe. Keep a record of account information such as email ID, phone numbers you've provided, alternative email addresses given and security questions with answers. Keep this information in a safe and secure place, such as on a piece of paper stored in your home. Some sites, such as Facebook and Twitter, allow you to download such information to your computer, so you might like to do this every 3 to 4 months.

• Password lists: This is a touchy subject. Most advice is to keep passwords in your head. The reality is that many people cannot do this effectively, especially if you need different passwords for dozens or even hundreds of sites. Find a sensible way to keep copies of such passwords safely, such as paper written lists (for example, divide into different lists, keep in different places), not writing down passwords for your most used accounts (those ones ought to be easily remembered) or only writing down passwords for accounts that have no sensitive information when entered, etc. You'll need to devise a safe way that works for you, bearing in mind that many sites offer password retrieval to cover forgetfulness.
• Be aware that if you keep lists of passwords etc. on your computer, and your computer is hacked, all of the listed accounts may be compromised.
• Use a good code to keep any stored personal reminder information safe from being read. You can make it up or learn one; the idea is that unless you're harboring an important state secret, most hackers won't persist with anything that is simply too much effort.

Reduce the chances that you'll end up spamming others. Spam can occur when your email or social networking account is hacked and your list of contacts is used to send on spam from your address/account. Ways to avoid this happening include having a strong password so your account cannot be hacked, not adding friends in Facebook whom you don't know, not clicking on links in emails from people you don't know, etc.

• Never reply to emails that land in your spam folder. Delete them immediately. By replying, even in a gesture of humor, you confirm your existence and you'll just keep getting more spam from the sender.

Culled from : http://m.wikihow.com/Protect-Your-Web-Accounts-from-Being-Hacked

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VICTIM BLAMING: NO ONE DESERVES TO BE ABUSED.

According to Wikipedia, Victim blaming occurs when the victim of a crime or any wrongful act is held entirely or partially responsible for the harm that befell them. 

The most common emotional responses to sexual harassment, battering, and rape are guilt, fear, powerlessness, shame, betrayal, anger, and denial. Guilt is often the first and deepest response. Anger may arise only later; this is not surprising, because women often have no sense of a right to be free from these kinds of violence.

Women may feel guilty about violence done to them because they are taught that their job is to make men happy, and if they aren't, they are to blame. Many of us heard from our parents, "Boys will be boys, so girls must take care"-- the message being that women can avoid unwanted male attention if only they are "careful enough." If anything goes wrong, it must be their fault. 

Blaming the victim releases the man who commits violence from the responsibility for what he has done. Friends or family may blame the victim in order to feel safe themselves: "She got raped because she walked alone after midnight. I'd never do that, so rape won't happen to me."

(Culled from www.feminist.com)

This in itself excuses the act perpetrated by boys. Everyone should be responsible for their actions. If we begin to enlighten and educate our boys in this respect, they will understand that their actions will have repercussions. This might help curb sexual violence and could possibly educate/eliminate victim blaming. (Ayodeji Osowobi- Stand To End Rape Initiative).

No one deserves to be abused either physically or physically no matter the circumstances. Men who undergo abuse find it difficult to speak out because the society blames such a man for being a weakling. Emotional abuse is more deadly than physical abuse. Don't keep silent, forget about what the society will say. Seek for help. Reach out to the appropriate authorities.

In order to stop victim blaming, it is helpful to understand why people do it in the first place. One reason people blame a victim/ survivor is to distance themselves from an unpleasant occurrence and this gives a false sense that this could not happen to them. By labeling or accusing the victim/ survivor,others can see the victim/survivor as different from themselves. We need to help people understand that this is not a helpful reaction.

(Culled from www.stoprelationshipabuse.org/educated/avoiding-victim-blaming)